Addictions is nothing new to the human race. In the past, when thinking of addictions, most people think of people have an addiction to drugs, sex or alcohol. In today's digital world, humans are experiencing various forms of addictions like never before, which have created many to become emotional high addicts. Once high, you need more and more of the source in order to fulfill the hormonal flow going on in the brain.
As mentioned in a former blog post, Is Love the Most Powerful Force on the Planet?, in the past, our ancestors only experienced highs from procreation, sex and child birth. The sad and scary part of today's addictions, is that many of these addictions are warping man's minds, creating real-life monsters, psychopaths, zombies out of many people's souls. According to the American Society of Addiction Medicine, addiction is, "a primary, chronic disease of brain reward, motivation, memory and related circuitry. Dysfunction in these circuits leads to characteristic biological, psychological, social and spiritual manifestations. This is reflected in an individual pathologically pursuing reward and/or relief by substance use and other behaviors. Addiction is characterized by inability to consistently abstain, impairment in behavioral control, craving, diminished recognition of significant problems with one’s behaviors and interpersonal relationships, and a dysfunctional emotional response. Like other chronic diseases, addiction often involves cycles of relapse and remission. Without treatment or engagement in recovery activities, addiction is progressive and can result in disability or premature death." It is common for people to have more than one addiction today. In fact, some people trade in one addiction for another. I had a Dietician friend who worked in a bariatric clinic and had "arguments" with the doctors as she expressed this is a psychological, and not just an addiction to bad food. She found that post surgery, many of these people traded in their food addiction for gambling, alcohol, smoking or some other negative habit/addiction. Another example is that research has found that people who have sex or love addictions or trauma, also have eating issues / addictions. The point is that many issues root to a spiritual and psychological warfare. Here are some addictions that plague the modern man's soul that goes beyond drugs, gambling, sex and alcohol abuse.
Video Games
"Gaming disorder" is a serious issue today, especially amongst techies. Introduced in the 1970's, games today are far from the origins of the "Oregon Trail." Today gaming addiction is seen on the same level as gambling. Now that games are available 24/7, most people are hooked, playing for hours everyday instead of once at the arcades. Research is still trying to figure out as most believe gaming addiction is a type of impulse control disorder. Some have the thrill of winning which releases dopamine, a brain chemical that elevates mood and provides a rush of energy. Many question what games do the subconscious mind as most games today are violent and include mass killing. Games "encourage" a sedentary lifestyle, which further isolates people from humans. Some people can play games and never be addicted, but most people fall into the rabbit hole and get lost in, or addicted to, a virtual reality.
Pornography Addiction
Porn is one of the major issues today, which affects more men than women. Today's porn is nothing like it was 20-40 years ago. For many, watching porn starts off as innocent but can eventually lead to a "dangerous" place mentally and socially. Porn has four stages as noted from Diagnosing and Treating Pornography Addiction. Dr. Victor Cline provides a model of pornography addiction with 4 progressive steps:
When the final sexual fluids are released, the body secretes serotonin, which promotes relaxation and calmness. Overall, porn hijacks the brain and short-circuits the system.
Love Addiction
We all dream of falling in love with Mr. or Mrs. Right. Some people, like adrenaline and outdoor junkies, have an addiction of falling in love. They love the high one gets from the initial stages of romance, but once the honeymoon phase wears off, they discard the relationship, in search for the next perfect person. Some love addicts put their partner on a pedestal and put more energy and attention towards them than themselves. At the core, many love addicts have this fantasy that their partner will rescue them, and provide them unconditional attention at all times, resolving any issues or problems they have. When in love, love encompasses their entire existence. They have a fear of being alone or rejected. The excitement of new love, triggers the release of these neurotransmitters, stimulating the brain’s reward system. Most love addicts have issues from childhood trauma or a lack of love from their youth, which needs to be resolved. Some of this I believe has been programmed in our heads from chronic Disney fairy tales from our youth.
Shopping Addiction
Consumerism was a great experiment, and guess what it worked. In today's decadent society, many people are addicted to shopping and finding something new. Compulsive shoppers experience a euphoria when purchasing new goods. However, like the hedonic treadmill, the euphoria wears off, but needs to be refilled with buying something else. Endorphins are released, which blots out discomfort. It is said that compulsive spending or shopping affects about six percent, or 17 million people, of the US population. One root of the problem is the lack of control one has in their life or on their impulses.
Exercise Addiction
Believe it or not, exercise can be addictive. There is a reason runners get addicted to running because of the "runner's high." There is a tipping point, when healthy exercise turns into an obsession for whatever reason. Some may exercise hours per day because they fear getting fat, or want to lose weight because they think they're fat. Some exercise because of control in their life where others use exercise as a replacement to some other addiction.
Food Addiction
Marketers and modern day boxed foods have done a GREAT job at controlling the US population. Some people have a poor palate addicted to salt and sugar, but most have emotional eating issues. These issues lead to consuming high amounts of comfort food or actual eating disorders themselves. Whatever the root cause of the issue is, the brain is affected by emotional eating disorders / impulses. The American Addiction Center states, "The brain is designed to react to a specific amount of dopamine, researchers say, and when it is provided with a dopamine signal that is too big, changes can result. The brain can turn off dopamine receptors, to muffle the next overeating onslaught, and that means people might eat even more during the next session. Dopamine feels good, and a rush feels wonderful. People who want that rush might need to eat more to get it. This is the same cycle of dopamine flood and response seen in people who take drugs like heroin or OxyContin. These people also need to take in more to feel the same rush, and these people find it hard to stop taking drugs. Similarly, people with a long history of overeating might also find it hard to stop, due to the brain’s changes. These people are not making the choice to overeat. They are dealing with damaged brain cells." Workaholics This is a tough addiction to identify because some people are born to work and make a difference in this world. Some people's lives and identity revolves around work. They don't have hobbies and everything else in life is secondary. Some work so much because they are security junkies. Some workaholics are perfectionists and are their toughest critics. When work controls the life of someone, it is important to step back and analyze how your job affects your life. Have you suffered from addiction? Do you know of any "uncommon" addictions that are becoming more common in today's digital age? In college, I suffered from exercise and some form of food addiction, which is in part the reason why I wrote, "Finding Om: An Indian Journey of Rickshaws, Chai, Chapattis and Gurus." so people can heal, discover pieces of their psychology and find the connection to their spirit all while enjoying this crazy thing we call life. Let's Connect!
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We perceive and interpret countless thoughts throughout the day. Many people do not realize that we have two distinct levels of our mind. The higher mind, and the lower mind. The two levels of mind are in operation at moment in time. In order to live an optimal life, a balance of both is needed.
THE LOWER MIND – FEAR, DOUBT & DISBELIEF
The operations and movement of life on planet earth are usually interpreted through our lower mind. The lower mind is the concrete mind, which focuses on logic, reason and fact. Because it is factual in nature, the thinking is very linear (which logic usually is), and keeps us in a limited belief cycle. Because the lower mind is limited coupled with facts based on past limitations, this keeps us in the same cycle of accessing limited beliefs.
The lower mind is the representation of our wounded or damaged ego. Some say this is the deception part of our mind because it convinces the ego we are limited and are separate from universal power and truth. Manipulation results as the ego believes in needs to lie and cheat his or her way through to success. The ego has many layers but include two prominent gateways, the inferior and superior ego. The inferior ego is the part of having a low self-esteem and not thinking you are good enough or worthy. The superior ego is the part of thinking that you are better and smarter than everyone else, and no one can do the job like you can. If a person is aggressive and violent and has a superior ego complex, he or she can become dangerous. Physiologically speaking, the reptilian brain also known as the instinctual or dinosaur brain, is the lowest part of the brain. The reptilian brain is based on autopilot survival modes of fight or flight. The lower mind activates the need to procreate and mate and to stay safe. Spiritually, the lower mind houses negative thoughts and emotions. Fear also operates here, which triggers negative thinking and behaviors. This is why movies, the news and video games have such an impact on our brains, because it instills fear and triggers lower mind thinking. This is the part of us that is skeptical, analytical, materialistic and opinionated. This keeps us in our old patterns, belief systems and ways, which does not encourage growth and faith. For some, they’ll continue to repeat the same karmic patterns until they’ve learned to tap into the higher mind. Since the lower mind operates on logic, the business world, financial establishments, schools and governments are mainly operated in this level of thinking. Therefore, so many people are losing “faith” in these organizations because nothing ever changes in these establishments besides the date and some new faces. THE HIGHER MIND – PURE KNOWLEDGE & DIVINE DESIGN
The higher mind is the gateway to our soul and intuition. This is the part of your mind that your higher self is communicating through. The higher mind surpasses ego, transcends boundaries and holds universal truths. This is the part of the mind that knows no matter how difficult the situation is, we are loved, worthy and continuously protected and guided by the divine and God. This is the part inspired by beauty, vulnerable emotions, aspirations, ideals and archetypes.
The higher mind is the entryway to genius ideas, creative power and innovative ideas/solutions. Your intuition communicates to you through your higher mind. Positivity and the silver lining perspective also speaks to people through their higher mind. Many things in life are illogical because spiritual experiences are not always linear or concrete like our lower minds tend to analyze. The higher mind does not worry about the “how.” It knows a change or something will occur, but “how” it will happen is not the worry.
THE KEY TO LIFE IS BALANCING BOTH MINDS
The higher and the lower mind continuously plays mind games. Most people need to break the habit of hanging out in the lower mind. When the lower mind is triggered, some people react with visceral emotions or impulses and are like wild animals needing to be tamed.
The goal is to calm the lower mind, and began to tap into the higher mind to receive answers and guidance. If people can open the lower mind, but allow leadership from the higher mind, many profound changes can occur in life. Imbalances occur because people tend to live primarily in the higher or lower mind. Artists continuously tapped into their creative power sometimes cannot navigate on planet earth. Those continuously living in their lower mind will never ascend because of fear or believing in that there is nothing better out there for them. One example is say someone is a sugar addict or a smoker. The body feels like crap long term and eventually the higher mind is going to start “crying” and request that the body start eating healthier or stop smoking. Using logic, one may start to research support groups, cessation products or a health coach. A person who experiences childhood trauma may feel permanently lost or damaged enough to where they unworthy of love and acceptance. These people tend to live in the past and need to focus on changing the present and connecting to a higher source for help and healing. The higher mind can lead them out of mental anguish and despair, but it takes a while to retrain the brain and rewire the neurons to get out of negative thinking patterns. What are your thoughts on the higher vs. the lower mind? Let's Connect!
Each and every day that we wake up with the morning sun is a blessing. We've made it another day, and no matter how hard life gets, just being alive is a blessing in disguise.
The world has been messed up since the dawn of man. If life is a battle between the light and the dark, it is no wonder hardship and suffering is a part of this planet. Spiritual people believe the soul incarnates to planet earth to learn various lessons and to grow its soul.
It's no secret that humans desire change, specifically at the collective level. And many people crave change at work and are great at improving themselves professionally, but not personally or spiritually.
Some people take their spiritual growth and relationship with God seriously, where others think this type of mentality is non-sense. Regardless of what one believes, every single day we wake up with the morning sun presents us with an opportunity to change, grow and evolve ourselves.
Change takes time. Sometimes it happens overnight, but for most people it is a continuous process and most find successful change when enlightening themselves and detaching from the material world.
Even thinking about changing, or pondering about a better life, is the first step to any change. You first must have some thoughts and then eventually take action. Most people cannot change alone. They require a support system. Logically, this would include family, friends, counselors, healers or anyone with the ability to guide others. Christians believe we need God and Christ to help us through our evolution in life. If we are in the driver's seat of our own life, we must take responsibility for our thoughts, actions and behaviors and we are solely in charge of our emotional health and well-being. Isn't that an amazing blessing and gift? To be able to wake up every day and start again - whether in thought or in behavior pattern - and continue to improve our lives each and every day. What do you think? Do you think every day is an ability to change? If you have any personal experiences that can help other people, please comment below!
If there is one great lesson I learned in divorce support group, it is that expectations leads to disappointment and possible destruction of a relationship. People, like horses, have blinders and are sometimes not aware of their actions (or lack of action). Bringing this to one's attention is not only important, but it is imperative to be empathetic and reasoning on where a person is at in their present moment.
People enter our lives with their own life experience, which includes good and bad times. This molds and shapes them into who they are in the present. When in a romantic experience, people will shift and change, hopefully for the better. So how do you meet people where they're at? Asking Questions
It is important to have good communication and ask questions on where the person is at. Like a job interview, the interviewers will ask candidates a variety of questions. It is important to know where a person is at, and how he/she got there. Where are they now? And where are they going? And people have blinders. Exposing blinders, or limitations, in a diplomatic way helps one become aware on their areas that require improvement.
Self Examination & Communication
Self examination is something that is desperately needed today. Too many people are wrapped up in their own world of self-absorption that they cannot empathize or see various perspectives. If someone brings up an issue, you need to take their feelings seriously and look within to discern their statement. This is best handled diplomatically, where you can present your case or "rebuttal" on their response.
For some people this is not easy to do as they take everything offensively; however, if you find yourself stuck in the same situations or behavior loops, it is necessary to look within. With this, it is important to find tools (or make goals) on how to improve the situation. Communication makes or breaks any relationship. It is essential, but maturity is what keeps communication fluid and clear. I believe in clear, concise and straightforward communication because it does not play any mind games. It maybe best to avoid words like should, would and could because they are theoretical and leads to expectations like, "You could have done it this way." Low emotional intelligence, being defensive or chronically on-attack, damages situations. It is not easy to reach these people, especially if "treading" on egg shells. Check-ins may be necessary to make sure each party is happy or on the same page. It is important to see where a person is at in their life and meet them half way. We must learn how to let go of uneven desires and become the best version of ourselves (and better communicators). Let's Connect!
There seems to be two movements going on in the world. One movement is the one of the awakening, and the development of one's soul. The other is toward narcissism and chronic self centeredness and selfishness.
The spiritual awakening movement usually opens the pathway for people to become empathetic and sympathetic. The rise in the "me" and "I" culture has bred mild narcissistic behaviors. It is the era where people are solely concerned about themselves, their job title and their income. On top of that, people cannot see situations or "hot topics" from both sides of the story, or through different lenses. Today, I notice a trend of people becoming empathetic, and on the other end of the spectrum, people displaying more signs of mild narcissism. So where exactly are we headed? Good question. “Narcissistic personality disorder is named for Narcissus, from Greek mythology, who fell in love with his own reflection. Freud used the term to describe persons who were self-absorbed, and psychoanalysts have focused on the narcissist’s need to bolster his or her self-esteem through grandiose fantasy, exaggerated ambition, exhibitionism, and feelings of entitlement.”
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I had fear. Fear is real. Fear is a legit feeling one has toward something. At points on the camino, I had meltdowns as I was the only soul on the trail. At times I felt alone. This triggered my wound on the fear of being alone. At times I have no fear of being on my own. I have my own peace, but I have found that going through life with another human being is one of the most precious gifts in life.
Love will always be the most powerful force on the planet.
My camino was a cathartic purge, a trail that led me to a new chapter.
The Camino de Santiago was a lifesaver. It initiated a new chapter in my book of life. A rebirth. A coming out as Christian. I found a new love with life, myself, the planet, Christ and God.
Even if it doesn't work out like I'd hope, my soul has been called to further the spread the light from a new lens. Before the camino, I had dreams of writing a book about my experience. I've had inklings about writing another book over the last year. But this time, the title would be, "Finding Home."
I don't know how many times I cried in 2018, definitely over one hundred. But, not all tears are tears of sadness. Some tears were tears of happiness. Other tears were emotional due to being touched by God.
Although most of my Jesus Year was rough, I am thankful for everything I learned because it's led me to a better place. Like a graduation, my "diploma" from divorce has led me to be wise like a serpent, and innocent like a dove. We'll see what God and life has in store for me. Que Sera Sera.
Happy Jesus Year to you! Check out my Camino de Santiago Portuguese Way videos on Youtube!
Let's Connect!
We live in a fallen world, and thanks to the rise in consumerism we've lost our way. Corporate think tanks, the media and social media in general projects this image, which makes us aspire to live a perfect life and/or has brought out the ugliness in use, which makes us aspire to nothing.
Many people have lost their way. But, many people are finding their way back to spirituality and God. Though we can argue about various forms of spirituality, just know that many people on their path to God have good intentions.
Life on planet earth should be fun. I agree with enjoying life, but not in a vain way. I do not promote promiscuity, infidelity, greed or vanity etc.
Many spiritual people learn their lessons, and somewhere along the way fall off the path and get wrapped up in the earth plane. They get lost in job titles, money, possessions and consumerism in general.
Titus 1:16
They claim to know God, but by their actions they deny him. They are detestable, disobedient and unfit for doing anything good.
There are certain necessities today such as a cell phone, computer and wifi. But our lives in America are swarming with so much crap, some who have boxes from floor to ceiling with goods.
Some people are so empty and lonely inside that they bury themselves in work or hide behind their possessions to fulfill a void.
The art and balance of life on planet earth is to respect and appreciate what you have, or what you get without losing sight of God. It's as if your feet are grounded, but your eyes continuously look upwards.
Today we are so disconnected from where our food comes from and thanks to globalism, almost every type of food is available year round rather than seasonally. And with the overuse of technology, we are further disconnected from ourselves, the truth and God.
The balance between the spiritual and the material world is gratitude. Nothing, and no one person, should be taken for granted because anything in this world is replaceable.
I believe hyperawareness and detachment are key. It's appreciating or having childlike fun with materialism, but not being attached like Ebenezer Scrooge. Whatever you accumulate can be gone or taken from you in an instant.
That beautiful, brand new car can be totaled. That new iPhone can be stolen. That amazing new house can be burnt down. Sometimes life and God teaches us the hardest lessons when we become cocky and lost. Darkness blinds us with fun and excitement and once the light shines through it teaches us the hardest of lessons.
Maya is illusion. And many people live in illusion with materialism. Common sense and logic / rational thinking is necessary to live within or under your means. The lust many people have for wealth is never ending.
Some hippie-vagabond souls live frugally because they spend their "wealth" on experience rather than material goods. Where many people fall or trip is that they are so focused on obtaining material goods whether to obtain it, or to fulfill them. As a lover of antiques, people care for these items, not only because they're old, but because they were made with quality. Quality items last and can be handed down to our future generation. On the other hand, this new age IKEA culture is disposable. Our consumption and turn over of these items are high.
The world of spiritual manifestation for abundance, I feel, messes people up more because they sit, meditate, focus on what they want and fail. The spiritual world is our spirit. The material world is our logic.
Certain common sense things are necessary to balance both worlds. We can't live a life of ignorance, racking up credit card debt and gluttony and putting our entire will in God's hands.
Hard work is necessary to achieve the impossible. This world and innovation has been built up on hard working minds, heads and hands.
In my life experience, the more I focused on God and cared less about materialism, the more abundant I became. Now my life is more abundant with experience, but each lesson has been a graduation of sorts. The more I learned and became aware of the lesson, the more life gave me.
That I believe is the "secret" to manifestation, abundance and wealth. Timing and one's soul maturity is important. Keep looking inward, and don't forget to say thanks to people as well as God.
I planned this trip in early September and with only six weeks to train, I have had no aches or pains, no blisters, a little bit of soreness at first, but now I am not even getting sore. I am "addicted" to carrying that bag, or that load on my back. Even with my bag loaded, I walk to the grocery store to add another 6-8 pounds to my bag - there is absolutely zero affect on my back or my legs.
During some walks, I feel God speak to me that this is not a physical journey, but an emotional and spiritual journey into my mind, body and soul.
Walking around Seattle in fall is stunning. Flowers still bloom while the trees change color. The foliage encourages the blossoming of the true color of my soul. As I watch the leaves fall, it is the time and a sign to let go. Let go of the things that no longer serve me.
âBut with every footstep around this city I recognize the natural death and rebirth process. While God chooses every leaf that falls off a tree, I notice figs still bloom on a tree. Part of human existence includes letting go, and rebuilding up. Our human bodies are no different than nature where we have this synergy between anabolism and catabolism.
Ever since living in Germany, I've become more fascinated with the forest. Naturally attracted to water, I've transitioned from the light and airy sun-worshipping beaches and entered the depths of my ancient soul amidst archaic trees.
The thing is, I am actually doing good and fine in my life right. Im exhausted from work, but that is okay. Once I booked this trip, I found much peace in my life. My attitude changed and my outlook on life became brighter. I processed my divorced and in the spring I was ready to move forward with my life. I am very accepting of people and their life choices and lifestyle.
âI understand that people enter our lives for a reason, a season or a lifetime.
When my ex-husband told me on October 18, 2017 that he wanted a divorce, my entire reality shifted. I just got back from a trip in Germany and for some reason during that trip I hit the upmost pivotal gratitude for that man and my marriage. I was ready for the next thing, which I thought would be to have a child. There was miscommunication on that very important topic.
As he told me this, I started saying, "No. No. No. You need to believe in me." While we both started crying, I had a psychic vision of a hand holding a rolled-up diploma in the air with graduation hats flying into the air. My intuition doesn't hear things much, but I had a voice inside my head say, "You got it. You graduated. You learned your lesson." My laptop died and for 17 days I sat in silence, realizing how intellectual and work-orientated we were, and partly my fault, didn't tap much into the emotional world. I looked in the mirror and expressed all of my faults and admitted everything I did wrong or took for granted.
Completely crushed, I knew it was me fighting against God or our soul's contract. I was on a sinking ship and I looked him in the eyes and told him that I am going to fight for him. And I did that. I wrote several novel-like letters. One 17 pages, a 33-page hand written book on our memories together, and another 7 page plea expressing how I changed.
None of it worked. I went home for Thanksgiving and cried at the lake near my parent's home. I sat on a log in the forest wanting to die. I googled every Christian prayer to save a marriage. And each time I did these things, our connection became more disconnected. He started dating someone. He cut me off social media. He cut my family off social media. He completely detached his life from any memories of 10 years together. He told me that everyday I treated him good, with kindness and respect. On some deeper subconscious, intuitive level he told me that he chose me, but I didn't choose him.
âI accepted my fate. Being the one left behind, especially blind sided can really fuck you up unless you have enough grounding and acceptance in life. It is very easy as a woman to deny a man's feelings or needs. Men are strong on the exterior, but inside sometimes I feel they are more sensitive and emotional than women. Inside every man is a little boy.
I needed to get out but I couldn't as I had to scramble to figure out my job situation. In January, I earned just under $2,000 and my rent is just under $1600. I almost impulsively moved to Chicago or Philadelphia, in hopes of starting a new life, and in the future, finding a more traditional man.
I processed, I grieved, I forgave. I realized I am just another example of a tragic love story in this world of human existence.
I needed to do something for myself, which is why the St. James has been chosen, but at the right time.
Actually, I am over my divorce, but what I am still attached to is the fear of not finding a life partner or someone who treats me well. My ex was a romantic man, and I took that for granted at times. Never again will I do that. But on the flip side, that man also took me for granted, for which I shut down emotionally. We were both selfless, selfish, loving, caring and ignorant to each other. We were both suffering in flighty Seattle after living in Germany where loyalty, honesty and integrity were a large part of their culture. The main issue was not communicating feelings in order to protect each other's emotions.
Divorce ignited all these fears in college and wounds of being absolutely shitted on and used by men. Men are logical. Most women are moral. It is very easy to take advantage of spiritually-based women who can be naive.
I've been the weekend girlfriend. I've been the friend with benefits. I've been used emotionally. I've been lied to. I've been used for the adventurous experience. Women can be horrible people too, but after conversations with my beta male friends. It's the nice people who always get shitted on - man or woman.
But through the turmoil of my confidence and soul being flushed down the toilet, I rediscovered a deeper connection to self love. My life is best operated with balance. I like how I balance the material and the spiritual world. I like how I appreciate a balance between arts, science and athletics. I like that I am straightforward. I like that I am modest, but also creative and free spirited. I like how I am a cheerleader, encouraging my partner to become the man he wants to be, balancing healthy degrees of freedom. I love myself. I love my flaws. I love my strengths.
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My 2018 has been nothing but breadcrumbs and false hopes all while getting beaten over the head by men. The lies. The emotional manipulation. The flakiness. I needed a break. I lost my marriage. I've lost my mind with the corruption of the divorce court where I believe in equality for both partners. I've lost important freelance work. I fractured my toe. I've been ghosted. I can't seem to get a full-time job in one of the most prosperous cities. I haven't even mildly dated, only meeting people naturally, to find out these guys either had girlfriends, open relationships or used me for emotional support while they get sexual pleasures from whatever dark shit they dabble in with multiple pleasures. I've always been suspicious of the tech industry and the programming that happens in these men's brains have completely destroyed their reality of what women want. Women don't want to be texted like a bar slut and they don't want be treated like a real world porn star. Even my gay Italian friend said straight men are "dumb," and don't realize women don't want to be texted this dirty stuff (in the initial stages).
Modern men today are cowards, and part of this is socially engineered. Women respect strong and honest men. They ghost as they are too afraid to hurt someone's feelings. They are too selfish to be upfront about what they are looking for and will lie and manipulate to get you into the sack, or boast about your beauty behind their girlfriend's back. They can't ask a woman out on a date as they fear rejection. That is just part of being a man. If you want to date a feminine woman you have to take the lead.
All of my friends told me to download a dating app and get laid. I felt I had healthy coping mechanisms of rediscovering myself through counseling, rock climbing and various types of yoga. Somehow my mind is stronger than my body and I can resist all forms of temptations.
Work has taken over our souls and relationships are either of convenience or whatever can fit into our work week. Many men in this city have like 4-6 side options figuring out who will be the winner. I've counseled sex addicts and they have dreams of epic sex parties or being choked during sex. I can't understand this mentality, but I do not judge it. Throughout my spiritual experience I believe darkness warps people's minds causing them to become further lost souls. I believe God sends those people to me for me to give them an ounce of light in their life.
My brain operates on purity, innocence and depth. I dream of fairy-tale-like romance like a nice dance around the Christmas tree to classical music. Or having a picnic on a nice summer's day while reading poetry from some 1922 vintage book. I also enjoy the non-refined frolics of life like drinking beer and watching sports.
I feel I have no relevance to life today. And on this walk, I want to let go of that belief. I believe there are people like me in this world. We are the minority, but through God's will, we will find each other. Whatever happens on this journey is meant for me, but it is a reset button. A button coming a year in, and although I wanted to do this 7 months ago, somehow timing always works best in life when it's meant to be.
I love cooking. I find it therapeutic and ignites a different sense of creativity. I follow alot of intuitive cooking, which means I dont necessarily "follow the rules" on exact measurements but sometimes "go with my gut" on what spices and such are needed or necessary. I've also discovered through my cooking I don't always time things but rather use my sense of smell to indicate when a pie, or baked good is near done. Whenever the kitchen become aromatic it is a sign that whatever is in the oven is ready to be checked.
Alongside cooking, I teach yoga. Today, I focus most of my teaching on moderate and slow flows, for which require ambient or down-tempo music.
At the retreat, I played various playlists using mixcloud.com, and wanted to share my favorite tracks. I not only use these in my yoga classes, but also in the kitchen to inspire yet another culinary creation.
Enjoy!
Change is inevitable, but necessary.
The human experience is no exception to change, transitions and highs and lows in life. It is utterly delusional to think that our life will follow the same path as a starry-eyed Hollywood movie; however, when analyzing these films, the main character encounters various obstacles and struggles.
Humans don't like change, but they crave and desire change. The biggest change to one's life path is through having a child. Some people accept and celebrate this change, but fight to let go or to help their mental state.
It is not easy or comfortable to walk a new path in life while leaving the old behind.
During times of transitions, this is where the learning begins.
Like a future flower budding from the ground, this is moment where consciousness shifts to say goodbye to the dark and say hello to the light. The business world talks of an inflection point, a point where the concave changes directions, either toward growth or a decline. This is a pivotal point for one to wake up and listen to their higher mind and trust and believe that taking the "high road" will lead them to change.
Change is spiritual. It is the time of becoming a better version of yourself and push through boundaries of fear that have held you back from seeking your potential.
Spiritual journeys don't have to be epic adventures around the globe. For some, it is
Sadly, many people have not had good mentors or leaders in their life, specifically in the work world. A career shift is a spiritual change. When transitioning careers, one's soul or spirit guides them to something more meaningful in life. It is not uncommon to see tech geeks up and quit their job to open a bakery or a fitness company. Something in that corporate world sucked their soul dry and they wanted to do something more meaningful in life. That is the point of TRUE LIBERATION - the moment where your life, happiness and contribution to the world means more than the people and situations that brought you down. Many people today believe that drug use and sexual experimentation is liberation. In my experience, the more people dabble in those environments, the more their soul cries for help.
So how do you unlock the power of transitions?
If you want to change your career, you may need to go back to school or sign up for a certificate program.
If you want to improve your marriage, you may need marriage counseling.
If you want to improve your health, you may need to hire a trainer or a health coach.
The answer lies inside each and every one of us, but we just have to believe and trust in ourselves, our voice and our higher mind. Change and transition strengthens our spirit. It may not be easy and during this time we may experience more inflection points or potential outcomes.
If you want to change, you have to put in the work and find tools, people or support networks that will aide you on your journey.
Are you on a spiritual journey in life? Let's Connect and check out Mind Body Soul Food's other recent blog posts.
Author
Elizabeth Rae Kovar M.A. is Author of her memoir, Finding Om and is a Fitness Trainer, Yogi, Reiki Master, Presenter and Lover of Life. To view her portfolio please visit www.elizabethkovar.com
Follow her travels at: lemontreetravel.com
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