As humans evolve in the Age of Aquarius, a new consciousness will unfold in humanity and relationships. Soul mates are not a new concept, but many people may find their soul mates in this new age. It’s part of the human “duty” to expand consciousness with spiritual and meaningful relationships.
So, what do I do if I meet my soul mate while I am married?
First, take a deep breath and do not cheat. Although you may be caught in the most beautiful romance known to man, cheating produces a psychological mess between both parties. If one person is single, he or she will desire and hope the other will leave his or her marriage.
It sounds like common sense, but many people follow the heart rather than logic in this type of scenario. Although the single person will want the other person to leave the marriage, the individual who is married has a lot of thinking to do. They have two decisions, to leave or stay with the marriage. The presence of a soul mate during marriage blossoms many lessons. If the person is caught in a negative or dead-end marriage, this may be a “wake up” call to show the person what true love feels like. However, it can also be a “wake up” call to reanalyze the marriage and work through difficult times.
So, if your soul mate is married, leave sex out of the relationship. Unless a person is completely heartless, sex attaches emotions and the deeper you commit your soul, the harder it is to heal the wound if the person doesn’t leave the marriage. Do you want to be a lesson and the secret mistress or sex-fling? You may be sleeping with your soul mate, but he or she is also a human with emotions and needs, which does not exempt them from hurting your feelings.
Not cheating demonstrates respect, control and self-confidence. Plus, many do not realize cheating is a test. It is a test to show how mature you are and if you can sustain pleasure. Those who think about the entire party involved can sustain sexual urges with a “big picture” approach. I have found on my journey that those who are astrologically more impulsive such as fire and mutable signs (there are many factors to this and any sign can be impulsive) can “more easily” fall into bed. Can you control your impulsive side? The way I view the situation, it is best to cherish the friendship than to ruin a deep bond caused from resentment or messy webs.
Second, do not force or expect the other person to leave his or her marriage. When leaving a marriage, a person considers many logical and spiritual parts of human existence. A person analyzes everything from finances, length of relationship, children and the hard times. It is up to that person to choose their life course. Persuading, forcing or begging can lead to resentment or push the person away.
Next, this is the hardest for most, but live your life – with confidence. Depending on how vulnerable your psychology is, a spiritual connection can consume the human mind, ego and persona. You may be caught daydreaming about this person and feel lost without him or her. Continue to live your life to what is best for you and your spiritual progress. At the end of the day, you only have yourself to rely on, so its best to maintain your independence without giving your soul away.
Finally, ask yourself, “What am I attracting? And why?” Many people who believe in the Law of Attraction will question why you are attracting an unavailable man. I believe in this notion, but I do think people come up at unexpected times to challenge each other. If you see a pattern of continuously attracting unavailable men or women, then the answer is deep within you as to why. Or, those previous experiences could prepare you for this experience. Either way, it is good to check in with yourself as to why.
One of the biggest challenges is to understand the meeting and timing between the two people. Many will question, “why now” or “where was he three years earlier?” With deep spiritual understanding and trusting your instincts, you can better analyze the situation.
If you have any more points to add to this notion, please share in the comment box below. If you are interested in reading more about the realities of soul mates - click here.
Soul mates. Who doesn’t want to meet one? If you have any idyllic notion about love, you may be curious to meet a soul mate. In modern days, the term, “soul mate” coins a romantic notion between two people. Although common, there are many harsh realities about soul mates, which may not lead to love, romance and marriage.
-Soul Mates Have Work & Lessons– Many people believe that soul mates have “their work cut out for them.” Although the bubbly and gooey feelings exist, long-term there may be challenges that need worked out. Challenges vary across the board. Differences may include religious orientation, personality conflicts, or your soul mate is married with kids. Somewhere in the spiritual world, (most likely) your souls created a contract to meet at a certain point in life. You both planned out your mission on the earth plane and decided to learn your lessons alone and together. This leads to my next point….
-Soul Mates Do Not Always Mean Romance – This is the hardest challenge for most people. Why would the universe send two people who are madly fond and in love with each other, but make it impossible to be with each other? Welcome to the life of lessons and souls mates. The harsh reality is that meeting a soul mate does not necessarily mean its going to lead to love, romance and marriage.
Free will can choose to be together, but there could be potentially difficult lessons and heartaches that lead to deeper psychological damage. Deep within, you know the lesson, but may not want to admit it. Many soul mates lead to great friends when you can accept the lessons that need to be learned. Soul mates may also present themselves in the same gender. There is a reason why people say, “soul sister” or a “brother from another mother.”
Rags to Riches – I wrote about this in my previous post, but want to emphasize true love versus idealism. The illusion of modern reality is that we all dream of meeting a rich, stable person who dresses nice, drives a nice car and swindles us with fancy meals. Many people who want those qualities in a (wo)man are running in a hamster wheel chasing an illusion and fail to recognize that life sent them their soul mate years ago. But, because of being blinded by materialism (s)he kicked the soul mate to the curb in hopes to meet his or her “dream mate.” You have met a soul mate when you TRULY do not care about their fashion, style, religion or income. If you love the fairy tales where the prince falls in love with a peasant lady, you need to realize that some soul mates are sent to us with the same story set in modern times. When you chase money and possessions you lose prospect of reality, and life may continue to send you the same lessons over and over again until you “get it.”
You May Have More Than One – Most people dream of meeting “the one.” Many people may meet “the one” or marry once. But, for most they have more than one soul mate. As mentioned before, when you create your “soul contract” for the earth plane, you have a plan, or blueprint, on whom you’ll meet and around what age. But, sometimes you end up meeting people that you are not supposed to meet. These soul mates (usually seen as impossible to live with due to earthly issues or soul contracts) were given access to meet you from a higher power. Generally, these are sent as lessons although the connection is intense.
Soul Mates are Humans – Unfortunately, we live in a modern world where the media and consumerism influence people. You may meet the man or woman of your dreams, but he or she is “not ready.” The person may be too immature and can treat you like shit. This is because the person is influenced through the superficial layer of life rather than connecting with the soul. Due to this, the person needs further soul development to pursue a cohesive relationship. This leads to the next point….
Unexpected Loss of Connection –A soul mate can disappear as fast as the steam that evaporates from boiling water. If this happens, it may not be your fault. This is an indicator that the soul mate was a lesson and not meant to be in your life forever. If the universe truly does NOT want you to be with the person, it will find a way – trust me! Divine interventions will block emails, text messages and anything else that would connect the two people. This could be part of the soul contract. Once their work and lessons are complete – poof they are gone.
Soul Mates Show You Something – If you are going through a hard time in your life, or believe that love is not possible, a soul mate enter your life to show you that deep love, or good people do exist. Some soul mates enter your life to boost your confidence or to work out karmic debt you both need to resolve.
These “harsh” realities are not meant to scare you or make you sad. But, in one moment of our lives when a soul mate enters and things are not “working,” there may be a reason behind it. When you look back years later after meeting a particular soul mate, you may realize that their presence was the best thing that happened to you. Humans are emotional creatures. When you detach from the emotion, and live with awareness and gratitude you can better appreciate the purpose of the meeting. Some people live life “blinded” and are not “open” to meeting fellow soul connections.
We all hope to fall in love and live with our soul mates, but depending on the "level or degree" of the soul mate, their presence has a purpose. One soul mate may prepare you for the next person with whom you may have a better life experience.
Have you met a soul mate and found that their purpose had a meaning rather than a lifelong connection? Please feel free to share your experiences below.
Aww, soul mates. We dream of them. We think of them. And we would “die” to meet them. But what exactly is a soul mate?
A soul mate is a person with whom you have a deep attraction or infinity. Soul mates go deeper than sharing the same taste of music, hobbies and cuisine. In fact, soul mates can have entirely different interests and outlooks in life. Many people believe they have met a soul mate. But, many confuse the notion with their imagination or a make-believe fantasy that a situation is better than what it is.
Many believe that a soul mate is where a soul is split in half, recreated into each gender and spend various reincarnations trying to find each other. I cannot confirm whether this is one-hundred percent accurate, but soul mates can also be the meeting of two souls who have spent time with each other in previous lives. Generally, there is a positive association between the two souls. Soul mates are not about romance and beauty. It's about spirituality and a development between two souls uniting as one unite.
So how do you know if you’ve met a soul mate? These tips are based on my life experience as well as conversations I have had with highly spiritual and energetic beings who have had profound experiences.
-Unexpected / Random Meeting – You may be in a point of your life where you question, “What is a soul mate?” but are not actively seeking the person. I have found that the meeting occurs in the most random or unexpected times and places of life. It usually occurs when you are not looking or least expect it.
-Spiritual Signs – You may not realize until you look back and connect the dots, but the universe will send you signs “galore.” Spirit animals, symbols, lucky (and angel) numbers and the name of the person may show up days or weeks before, during and after the meeting. These small signs can help reassure the meeting or connection between the soul mates. Soul mates who telepathically connect often see “signs” when the person is thinking or about to touch base with that person. For example, if your soul mate lives in Florida, you may notice a significant amount of Florida license plates for days even if you live across the country.
-Gut Feelings – You may experience a deep gut feeling, goosebumps, chills or tingling throughout the body when you meet the person. Often the spirit world reassures us through sending messages through our physical body.
-Unexplainable Attraction – This does not mean lust, but you may feel a “magnetic” pull toward the person. Although you may feel a deep sexual attraction, you would rather spend time with the person instead of rushing off to bed. There is a sense of comfort and familiarity that is only explained through the physical body with a deep, gut feeling. True love is of the soul and the subconscious mind knows something that the logical mind does not understand.
-Rags to Riches – The illusion of modern reality is that we all dream of meeting a rich, stable person who dresses nice, drives a nice car and swindles us with fancy meals. Many people who want those qualities in a (wo)man are running in a hamster wheel chasing an illusion and fail to recognize that life sent them their soul mate years ago. But, because of being blinded by materialism (s)he kicked the soul mate to the curb in hopes to meet his or her “dream mate.” You have met a soul mate when you TRULY do not care about their fashion, style, religion or income. There is one thing if a person is lazy and doesn’t want to work, but another to judge a person based on their income or sense of style. If you love the fairy tales where the prince falls in love with a peasant lady, you need to realize that some soul mates are sent to us with the same story set in modern times.
Have you met a soul mate? I would love to hear your comments about some signs or realities about how you knew that the person you met were soul mates.
Are you having a bad day? Or yet, a bad week or month? Life is like a river. The water flows and pushes forward whether the water flows up and over a rock or plunges to earth from a waterfall. In simple terms, life has ups and downs. The hard times are the down times, especially when the "dark" period lasts longer than we desire. A perfect example were the Dark Ages. While living in Europe, I've discovered how people lived and were tortured through hundreds of hard years through the dark ages. That time period lasted longer than most anticipated.
When life is not going your way, check your thoughts and find something to uplift and inspire you. Our thoughts directly affect our vibration with the universe. To become as bright as a lamp, remember these five quotes when life is not going your way.
WARNING: After reading this article you may realize that marketing warped your brain. Don’t worry, it’s time to take a stand and become independent with your thoughts and choices.
Several years into my fitness career my perceptions and beliefs about fitness changed once I moved to Seattle. What changed is for another blog, but as the fitness market grew so did my frustration. Why? Because of the bogus marketing techniques.
Several years ago I watched a three-minute YouTube advertisement. The ad promoted a “non invasive” bariatric surgery where a scope goes down the throat operated within the body. The semi-attractive doctor walked into the screen and opened with the traditional line that every fitness company uses, “Have you tried to lose weight but it hasn’t quit worked for you? Well now you can get bariatric surgery without the complications….” Frustrated, I questioned, “Why aren’t these doctors promoting lifestyle change before surgery? Do people realize they can’t eat certain things after this surgery?”
About a year later, I noticed an online ad focused to women and weightloss. Interested, I clicked on the ad, which showed a two-minute video about leptin shots. Leptin as the Greeks called it, "lepos" meaning "thin," is the the "satiety hormone." The ad opened with the same message, “Are you tired of dieting and exercising? Are you ready for something that will work for you?” Within thirty seconds the ad said, “Don’t you want to lose weight and still eat the things that you love? Yes you don’t have to give up any of these foods.” The video then showed images of brownies, pizza and soda pop. The video “educated” the consumer that you can still eat fast food and lose weight if you shoot yourself with their hormone shots.
But, that makes no sense, right? Welcome to the world of marketing.
In college, I earned a Sport Management degree and about twenty-percent of my classes were focused on marketing. Marketing is the act or promotion of a product and service. Marketing has existed for generations from war propaganda to magazine ads. Contemporary approaches are smart and know how to trigger psychology and deeper wants.
Fitness, health and wellness marketing is a big business. It’s not big, it’s enormous. In the US, fitness and health is a thirty billion dollar industry. Also, the diet/weight loss industry is a twenty billion dollar industry and has over one hundred million dieters. Capitalism allows our land of the free to be creative and generate new businesses. And why not fitness? Our obesity rates are out of this world and we no longer have a clear judgment on what and how to eat.
Someone, somewhere is trying to convince YOU and YOUR BRAIN to purchase his or her product. People are making a lot of money and will do or say anything to pry your brain. I’m not saying all businesses are like this as there are many well-intentioned services and products on the fitness market.
What I am aiming to reveal are the bogus weightloss treatments that sweep your problems under the rug to “provide you a solution without changing your habits.” It's a bogus lie, and deep down you may know its a lie, but will believe in anything to avoid change.
Have you ever walked around a city and seen signs that say, “World’s Best Pizza or New York City’s Best Pizza” here. Marketing is as easy as hanging a sign on the window that says, “Ohio’s Best Donuts.” Because if its not the best, who will buy it? I laugh at this example because I think of the movie Elf where Will Ferrell treks from the North Pole to New York City. He busted into a dingy coffeeshop and said, “Congratulations! You Finally did it! World’s best coffee right here, WOW!”
Before moving to Germany, I worked for a Seattle fitness company where we managed and offered fitness services to corporate building gyms. We conducted some local research to see what competitors charged and how they certified their trainers. I looked at several dozen websites. Gyms, studios and training-focused centers within a three-mile radius all claimed to have the best personal trainers in Seattle.
While at this job, I watched the infomercial for a Brazilian Booty / Butt Lift workout. I laughed at the before and after pictures as they took model thin women who “randomly” grew asses the size of melons. Everything looked photo-shopped from the way their skin glowed to the perfect circular cup of their breasts. (If you know anything about weightloss, most women lose fat in their breasts not gain unless there is plastic surgery). Why try to be like a Brazilian woman when you are an American? Born with your own beautiful qualities.
Now, please what I say next take it lightly and use it to your fuel your fire for change. Many ill-intentioned diet and weightloss products and services are looking for the “weak-minded.” I am NOT saying you have a weak mind, but they want to target the people who are desperate and so confused about weight management that you’ll try anything. They want the people who are in the hamster wheel just going round and around with negative beliefs that, “I will always be fat or weight loss doesn’t work for me.” As mentioned before, their job is to convince you that change is not necessary and you can stay in your comfort zone.
Marketing is the bait, you are the fish and your pocketbook is the hook. Once they hook you they want to keep it that way. There is a reason why the online term, “bait click” is popular. Are you more willing to read an article that says, “5 Ab Exercises to Build Strength” or “5 Fat-Blasting Ab Exercises to Flaunt a Six-Pack.” Do you see what I mean? Obviously, the second stimulates curiosity and the desire to have killer abs.
As a trainer, I’ve heard and seen it all. I’ve had clients so desperate they consumed two to three weightloss pills at a time, which is beyond dangerous for the body. I had one client who wanted to do a Paleo meal plan, and she asked my opinion. I looked at the options and weighed the pros and cons based on what I knew about her lifestyle. I replied, “Why starve yourself with 1,200 calories per day and waste your money when all you need to do is cut back on some alcohol and add more vegetables to your diet?”
What she did not want to face was her alcohol consumption. She used the meal plan to disguise her inner-problem – a really high wine consumption and eating out too much.
If there’s ever a time to use anger in a positive way it is now. You can get mad, sad or frustrated about your past failed efforts. But what is done is done. Now it is time to choose you and not surrender to desperation. Question everything and see what works for you. Nothing in life is a “hack” or quick fix – that’s the crap marketing instills in your brain. How many of you have repaired your marriage issues in one meditation or therapy session? Life is a process and life is a journey.
You are strong, beautiful and amazing – you just need to think and choose for yourself. To sign off, I leave you with this:
“Ascension and devolution requires an equal investment of choice.”
-LaShaun Middlebrooks Collier
In September 2013, I spent a weekend in a Washington farm town to undergo my Reiki training. The farm was beautifully decorated with flowers, fertile grass and an organic garden where we picked carrots and beets the size of my face. The owners claimed the power of Reiki and the energy they put into their garden produced voluptuous vegetables.
On Saturday, we obtained our first Reiki attunement. The experience was interesting but also enlightening. It was the next step into my spiritual development. As a yogi at heart, I believed in energy and the power of the planets, but failed to connect to the concepts regarding angels and spirit guides. I shunned at any belief that talked of concepts or “things” from the biblical notions.
During the day, we took a break and ate homemade meals and snacks. The food was fresh and made with love. We became energized through the power of food. We finished our afternoon sessions and off we went into town to spend the night in our hotel room. I drove to town and I floated on “Cloud Nine” with bountiful amounts of energy without one care in the world. I transformed into a whole new being and never felt this good before.
The small town atmosphere generally does not appeal to me. This particular town contained plenty of fast food chains and dingy restaurants that do not cater to a plant-based palate and lifestyle. I chose one of the golden king palaces to eat Chinese food. Surprisingly, I found only two vegetarian friendly meals. Without much choice, I ordered the veggie lo mein noodles.
The atmosphere felt depressing and stagnant. Everyone in the restaurant weighed over 300 pounds and scarfed the food as fast as they could. While in my particular “high” moment, I noticed the conversations the locals had about life and work. They clearly connected their complaints about their agonizing boss with their food. My meal came and to my disbelief the oversized portion would have fed a family of four.
I felt bad because these people were not exposed to anything else besides golden arches and the small town life. With the first bite of my food, I choked as I felt like a deer licking a salt block. Is this even food? It seemed like some poisonous palate control. I watched this family eat as they claimed the fried pigskin was the best thing they’ve ever eaten. All the food looked pale brown and stale with sadness.
After dinner, I felt high and low at the same time. I was not used to feeling this good and walked to the Dairy Queen across the street because sweet goes best with salty. I internally battled thoughts in my head. Deep down I did not want to eat the ice cream or anything sweet. My body rejected that thought and flavor. But, something was not right. In some sense the dessert was habitual especially during times of sadness. I ordered a flurry and went to my hotel room.
I put on the television and ate several bites of the flurry. I immediately felt a headache and my body slump into a pool of “blahness.” I felt overfull, stuffed, bloated and gross. Why did I eat this? Why did I ignore my gut feelings? Anyone who knows me knows I do not eat nor support fast food chains.
After moments of contemplation, I realized that I normally never feel this good. I was used to feeling stressed, tired, and like shit – a lot! Even my agonizing knee pain from teaching too many classes over the years miraculously disappeared that afternoon. From a stiff low back to a tired mind, I used the food to bring me down to my “normal state of feeling.” I normally did not feel good, lifted and vibrant.
I felt that my surroundings in the restaurant contributed as I subconsciously brought myself down to the same level of people. It was the first moment I realized that I ascended not only spiritually but also as a physical being. I noticed how energetics play a role in our life from food, atmosphere, peers and surroundings.
Is it okay to feel good? Do I deserve to feel this good? Yes, in fact everyone does. Feeling good felt different and somehow it subconsciously scared me. It was a very important lesson in humanity on how we label feeling like shit as the “norm.” We are programmed to feel this way because we are all “busy, tired and stressed.” And for most people, there is an underlining jealousy or insecurity to those who look, feel and breathe differently. But that is not normal.
The biggest gift you can give yourself is honesty. When I became honest about my situation it became the most liberating experience of my life (besides doing cool things while traveling).
So ask yourself, do you use food to bring you down?
To sign off I leave you with this,
“ We think fast food is equivalent to pornography, nutritionally speaking.” –Steve Elbert
One belief is that fueling the soul are long arduous tasks that require countless minutes for meditation or silent time. Although beneficial, there are simple and easy-to-do methods that you can do everyday.
Connect to the Breath
Nothing is more powerful than oxygen flow into the body. You can connect to your breath at your desk, in your car or when in nature. A powerful method is to inhale for five seconds and exhale for five seconds. Deep breathing relaxes the body and calms the mind.
Take a Walk Outside
Can you take fifteen minutes to walk outside? Combining movement, nature and oxygen flow you will cleanse the soul from any arduous responsibilities. If getting lost on a trail is not your thing, why not sit outside and read a book. Get lost in the pages, how relaxing is that?
Listen to Something Positive
YouTube is full of soul-searching videos that fire the spirit up for the day. Whenever I need a spiritual pep-step I turn to some of my favorite YouTube stations to remind myself how my mind and my thoughts are a powerful tool. It makes me feel that I can complete anything.
Write a Journal
Writing is one of the most powerful tools and gifts we have as humans. Whether you want to write about your thoughts or write positive quotes writing is a magnetic tool to release our inner thoughts, worries, dreams and demons. A year into writing Finding Om, I stumbled upon my travel journal from when I lived in Surfer’s Paradise, Australia in 2005. I looked back at all the wonderful memories but also my emotional state. I was a mess and obsessed over body image, diet and exercise to an unhealthy place. I knew it was a perfect addition to my book because real people can relate to real-world problems. Reading it eight to ten years later makes me realize how far I’ve come on my life journey to health, happiness and spirituality.
Do Something You Love
What do you love? I hear many people say, “If I only had time for arts and crafts I would be happy as I loved doing it.” Well, what can you do to incorporate it? If you take an honest look (without judgment) and realize how much time you spend online, watching TV and staring at your cell phone you probably have more time than you think. You just prioritize your time different.
We are all programmed creatures who soak in thoughts, habits and beliefs from our childhood, parents and society. If you are in a continuous negative pattern or desire a change – think differently. This takes time, but even changing the way you think about a situation – or how you react – is the best method to snowball a more positive mind.
Elizabeth Rae Kovar M.A. is Author of her memoir, Finding Om and is a Fitness Trainer, Yogi, Reiki Master, Presenter and Lover of Life. To view her portfolio please visit www.elizabethkovar.com